My Dad’s Eulogy
Normally I don’t like to prepare speeches. I prefer speaking from the heart and off the cuff but I knew that once I got up here I would be too emotional to want to do anything except scream.
I’m angry .I’ve been angry for the past 6 months as I’m sure everyone in this room is sharing that same feeling with me.
I know we’re all thinking the same thing – of all the people to have this happen to, why him? My Dad was the last person in the world that deserved and ending like that. Not that I would wish this tragedy on anyone but you would think that living a life as honorable as his, as noble and honest and self-less, you think that kind of a life would get you some sort of free pass.
But it doesn’t. It doesn’t matter what kind of a person you are. It didn’t matter that he was the best father anyone could ask for. That he was a loyal and loving husband. That he was a trusted friend. None of that saved him and it won’t save any of us. We all have the same chance of dying the way he did.
I have found comfort in one thing, though, and that is knowing that when my Dad was suffering, those last harsh days, he was surrounded by the people that loved him most. And we were all there BECAUSE of the man he was. In the end, the kind of man my Dad was DID matter.
And there were so many of you, coming to help in any way that you could. Bringing food, calling, visiting, comforting my mom, bringing my Dad to the casino even when it was impossible, these funeral arrangements…our family was completely taken care of because you jumped at the chance to help out in any way that you could.
And then there is my brother and sister in law. They were living with my parents through the entire ordeal, much longer than I was, so they had to deal with it in such a different way than me. John built a ramp for my dad when he was able to use a wheelchair. My brother, who has never built a thing in his life, builds this beautiful, perfect ramp. He did it all for him. And he learned how to do that from my Dad.
And my mom – what woman can do all that? She made my Dad’s last days the best they could be and she stayed strong all the way through. He was able to be at home, he was comfortable, all because of her. All those things she did…she did because she loved him.
It’s the reason we ALL did those things, because we loved him. And there is a reason that we loved him so much.
I can be certain when I say that my Dad is leaving an amazing legacy behind. Although it was cut short he lived his life exactly how he wanted it and I know he wouldn’t have changed a thing. Not too many people can say that. What my Dad valued was what he was surrounded with – a strong, tight knit family and good friends.
So, instead of staying angry let’s continue my Dad’s legacy. Let us stay close together, let us love our families and friends unconditionally, let us be honest, noble and self-less. It’s through those values that my Dad will be alive, inside all of us. Nothing can save us from death, but we can be saved in life, and that is when it truly matters most.
I want to close off by reading part of a song, one of my most favourites, which will remind me of my Dad, until the end of time.
You’re the only one who can hold your head up high.
Shake your fist at the gates saying,
“I have come home now…!
Fetch me the spirit, the son and the father.
Tell them their pillar of faith has ascended.
It’s time now.
My time now.
Give me my, give me my wings.”